tough few days

These past couple of days have been tough for me. I’m feeling stress and anxiety, having difficulty sleeping, and concentrating on day-to-day things. I’ve officially left university now and now have to wait on several things. I’m still waiting for my doctor to refer me to a psychiatrist. I’ve made a claim for unemployment benefit and am waiting for an interview for that. I’m waiting for a call from a housing association too, in my effort to get a 1 bedroom accommodation for myself.

All this waiting is making me depressed all over again. And during this time I’m trying to write a good CV so that I can get back into employment as quickly as possible. In the end though I’ve opted to pay for a professional writer to do one for me. I’ve been a good salesperson in the past, but I don’t sell myself very well. That’s more waiting again, it could take up to 14 days for the CV to be written.

I’ve tried to immerse myself in my music, but I’m feeling a lack of motivation for that too. It’s hard, learning to sing in a higher key than I was previously used to. I’ll get there, but it’ll take time and a lot of practice, but to practice I need to be motivated, and to be motivated I need to be not depressed. I may need to schedule another appointment with my GP.

Take things one step at a time. That’s what I’m telling myself. Tomorrow I’m heading into the local jobcentre office to make sure they have my claim on file properly. I made the claim online, but it certainly wasn’t as straightforward as the government would like people to believe. If I go in tomorrow and they can confirm my claim is on the system and that it is being processed that will be one thing I can worry slightly less about.

On Thursday I will try to arrange some work experience in a teaching, or teaching assistant role. I have a number I can ring which should get me in touch with the right people. If I can get that, it’ll be another weight off my shoulders, because If I can get the experience (at least 10 days worth) I can start applying for on the job training positions to become a primary school teacher. I have all other qualifications I need. I don’t want to spend the rest of my working life doing just administration.



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